Art In Situ

For the best art in Milan, get out of the galleries and head to the Il Cimitero Momumentale. The cemetery was created in 1870 and it still used today. The Italians do cemeteries just like they do life - over the top.

The tombstones, plaques, and family buildings are lavishly decorated with sculptures, candles, flowers, photos, and inscriptions. The art ranges from weeping angels to gruesome grim reapers to modern sculptures to scientific themes to Gothic arches to sculptures of the entire last supper scene.

Photography was frowned upon, so I could only snap a few shots with our little camera.

The Non-Fresco, Dan Brown Got Totally Wrong

I can think of a few works of art and a sampling of monuments that didn't quite live up to the expectations. When you have heard about a masterpiece, studied it in art history and history classes, and accumulated anticipation, sometimes you are going to be disappointed.

While Leonardo's leading lady can leave you wishing for more, his Last Supper leaves you fully amazed. I sprung for a guided tour for this visit - normally I avoid tours like the dog poop all over Europe's sidewalks. However, I did not have time to do all the research and create an audio tour for such a quick visit, so I happily shelled out the extra €3 for commentary and prayed cameras weren't allowed.


After proceeding through a series of humidity and pressure regulated rooms, we were suddenly face to face with Christ in Leonardo's masterpiece. The huge non-fresco (the guide was adamant that the Last Supper is NOT a fresco and this is the main reason it is so difficult to preserve) spanned the entire back wall, making it seem as if the room extended into the dining room of The Last Supper. The perspective and depth of the mural truly draws you into the painting and the emotion depicted on the disciples faces makes you feel as if you were there.

While the guide pointed out each of the apostles and explained their role in the story, I tried to determine if it really was John or Mary Magdalene. My thoughts were suddenly interrupted by her passionate explanation of why Dan Brown got it all wrong. She asked us that if we took nothing else from her talk to take this: John, being the youngest disciple, was historically portrayed with a feminine face to show his youth. No conspiracy, no hidden tales, just misinterpreted historical symbolism.

If the mural alone did not impress you with Leonardo's genius, you only had to turn around to compare it to a mural painted on the back wall by a contemporary of his. There was no comparison to be made. Well except that since the back mural was an actual fresco, the colors had retained their brilliance and intensity.

More pictures of the Church of Santa Maria delle Grazie can be found here.

Duomo & Piazza

Our trip to Milan started with a visit to the Piazza del Duomo - the square in the center of town. With Carnival coming up next weekend (Milan starts celebrating just as the rest of the world's parties are winding down), the square was a festive scene of children in costumes, confetti, silly string, friendship bracelet con artists, and the fashionable Milanese. The piazza is also the site of MTV Italia's TRL (that's "Total Request Live" for the older crowd). It seems the TRL crowd got really rowdy when the Jonas Brothers visited.

We grabbed lunch at Luini Panzerotti's - just around the corner from the church. After our travels, the warm stuffed calzones where like heaven on earth. With our bellies full, we set out to see the 4th largest church in Europe.

Every inch of the exterior of the Duomo is covered in spires, statues, gargoyles, and pointed arches - an over-the-top high Gothic facade. The pink marble was sparkling from its cleaning in 2008 and really gleamed compared to the surrounding buildings.

To truly appreciate the spires and statues, we climbed to the Duomo rooftop. Instead of walking through a forest of trees, you are walking through a maze of spires and statues. The main body of the roof is slightly angled and offers an amazing view of the Milan skyline. Some say you can see the Swiss Alps on a clear day - the question is when the last clear day was. The air is so hazy in Milan that even the closest buildings appear faded and dull.

The Piazza del Duomo is the place to people watch on a sunny afternoon. In a five minute gelato break we saw (around noon on a Sunday):

• 7 women wearing stilettos - and we are talking 4.5+ inch heels that tapered down to a very small point. Remember it is too late for the walk of shame and too early to be dressed for dinner. My favorite wearer was a sixty plus year-old lady with knee-high patent leather stiletto boots on and a full length fur coat!
• 7 men with man purses - if is a Gucci man purse, does that make it better?
• 15 women in fur coats - not just fur collars or fur trimmed, but real, 3/4 to full length fur coats. I really liked the fashion sense of the women wearing combat boats, purple hose, a floppy hat, and a full length fur coat.

The piazza is the place to see and be seen - just pray the pigeons don't poop on you.

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Return from Milan

Laura and I spent the last four days in Milan, Italy ("Milano" if you're Italian) and the neighboring cities of Bergamo and "fair Verona," as Shakespeare was known to write. It was a wonderful trip filled with sunshine, Roman ruins, and Renaissance masterpieces, all of which we'll share with you in the coming days. But for now, I shall whisk you off to the Milan Malpensa airport - where we "lay our scene," and a bizarre one at that.


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This tale of woe opens with Laura and I presenting our tickets to board our return flight from Milan. Laura, who as you will recall is newly and temporarily handicapped with an arm cast, was asked if she had a doctor's note to go along with her malady. This was a surprising question since no one had previously taken any interest in her cast - including security in both Amsterdam and Milan (the latter of whom confiscated our wine opener) and the employees responsible for us boarding the outbound flight from Amsterdam (on the same carrier, easyJet). Laura's answer, of course, was that no, she didn't have a doctor's note. And why would one be necessary?

"We can't let you board the flight without a doctor's certificate."

This was news to us, since she had already boarded a flight three days prior with no such thing.

"If you hadn't waited so late, the airport infirmary could have given you a note."

Well, if we had been informed the airline wouldn't serve the mildly disabled without a note, we surely would have gotten one. But this was all news to us. But there was a loophole - the overwhelmed ticket attendant called the captain to see if he would overrule the requirement and let Laura on the flight.

The answer was, of course, "No." At this point, fellow passengers in line nearby were starting to take notice of the situation with both curiosity and sympathy. Laura and I were starting to get worried about not being able to get home. So she did the natural thing: she asked the ticket attendant for scissors.

"I'm not telling you to take the cast off."

Laura's reply: "I'm not going to be stuck here." And with that, she began unraveling the soft outer layer of her cast while the ticket attendant looked on, aghast. As Laura pried apart the hard plaster layer, the ticket attendant (and others in line nearby) grimaced in imagined pain. But Laura was not deterred, as she pulled the last of the cast from her hand and gave it to the attendant to put in the garbage. The attendant watched in horrified silence as Laura, with her arm held close and her fingers bent awkwardly, scooted underneath the divider to join me in line. We boarded the plane with no further complaints from the ticket attendant or the captain.

What can I say? Laura's a trooper, folks.

After returning home, we found the rule in some fine print on easyJet's website:

You are not permitted to travel within 48 hours of having your cast fitted. Plaster casts that have been fitted for less than 48 hours need to be split. The split need to run along the entire length of the cast which must have been done prior to check in.

In all cases, passengers travelling [sic] with broken or fractured limbs in plaster are required to travel with a medical certificate confirming fitness to fly and the date that the cast was fitted.

The rule doesn't seem to be concerned with the cast being used to wallop fellow passengers (which was our initial assumption), but instead for the well-being of the person actually wearing the cast. Of course, Laura had been in the cast for well over 48 hours (as evident from the dirt, gelato, and pasta stains all over it), the cast was split by design, Laura was obviously fit to fly since she made it to Milan in the first place, and her injury didn't meet the usual definition of "broken" or "fractured."

So thanks, easyJet, for making Laura's next treatment that much more interesting, since the doctor will surely be perplexed about Laura's missing cast. (And please, doctor - can we get a note this time?)